When I was growing up, my dad always told me, “Don’t sweat the small shit.” I may have taken those words a bit too seriously, because the list of things I take seriously is pretty darn short. So while most people are worried about their careers, money and whatnot..I’m more worried about whether or not I have enough candy in my truck in case I run into these two:
Being a fun uncle is serious business. You’ve gotta constantly be looking for new ways to deliver the perfect combination of wedgies, swirlies, candy, leg punches, hugs and more candy. These two were riding Strider bikes before they were out of diapers,
and this last Christmas they got some “big bikes.” The promise was made that after they got better acquainted with the new bikes, I’d take them on a legit mountain biking trip. When that day finally came, I don’t know who was more excited.. them or me. Ok, it was me.
Arriving at the trail, we ran through the motions of pumping up tires and donning helmets. I only brought one Camelbak, and that’s a mistake I won’t make twice. They fought over the damn thing all day. It made for some cute photos, though.
Since I didn’t really know what their skill level would be, we started out on an easy downhill into the field.
It was obvious this was too easy for them, so we moved it on down the trail. I’d ride ahead and wait, and they’d come flying along right behind me. The boys were riding well and I was laughing constantly. We were all having a great day.
Of course, there were a few wrecks:
But I also got some really great action shots and video. Here’s a pic of Wyatt carving a left turn
Most of the hills were too steep for them to pedal, but they didn’t seem to mind pushing to the top as long as there was a downhill on the other side.
And of course, the topic of riding without helmets was brought up. As you can clearly hear in the following video, that idea was shot down.
More crashes and lessons in hiding pain
And what father wouldn’t love to get this video while he’s at work?
As the afternoon wore on, I was blown away (and slightly afraid) at how much faster the boys were riding. I mean, I don’t wanna be one of those people who thinks their nephew is the next big thing, but look at the speed this 5 year old is holding through the turns…
My face literally hurt from laughing and smiling so much that afternoon, but the true hilarity ensued when I taught these fine young men an important life lesson every uncle should teach his nephews….
…..and if that doesn’t make you laugh…you’re probably an asshole.
I’ll probably think about that trip when I’m on my deathbed. What a great day.
Tearing down a non-race course is a lot like picking up all the wrapping paper after Christmas morning. It’s depressing to know you’re gonna have to wait a year before you get to do it again. This year, though, has been very different. One might even go so far as to say it’s been awesome.
A few days ago, I loaded up my pack and set out to tear down the Western half of the CAC2 Orienteering course. The following is my account of this truly badass day.
9 am: Woke up and checked to see if anyone I had invited was going to show up. No dice; this would be a solo venture.
10 am: Driving down Highway J, I see a bald eagle swoop down and pick up some roadkill. I nearly wrecked my truck watching it happen. This was surely a sign that today was going to be awesome.
12:05 pm: Parked the truck at the end of County Rd 354, hit the woods and started hiking North. I could already hear the water ripping down Cedar Creek. Before long, I was crossing a small feeder creek and started finding beaver chews. I love finding this kind of stuff.
About 20 minutes later, I arrive where the CP flag should be.. and it isn’t there. With CP flags being $9 a piece, this was disappointing, for sure. I decided to sit on the cliff and look around. Sure enough, I spotted the flag about 100 feet downhill from where it was originally placed.
After gathering the next two flags, I decided to slide down the hill and follow the creek Northward for a bit. I started noticing a bunch of Blue Heron cranes flying around, and when I stopped to watch them I realized I was in the middle of their nesting grounds. Blue Herons are known to make their nests in large Sycamore trees, so I sat under one and watched them fly in and out of their nests. It was very cool to watch these giant birds swooping around. They make the oddest sounds..
This was now uncharted territory along Cedar Creek, and since I’d forgotten to bring my map I wasn’t sure if I was still on public ground. The houses on the bluffs above would make me an easy target for someone wanting to shoot a tresspasser so I made my way into the wooded area away from the creek. Ascending the bluff, I found yet another clifftop with the most scenic view I’ve found to date. Check this photo out:
Getting to the top of that cliff was tricky; it’s overgrown with cedars and some kind of vines. But once I got there, I found a pretty cool slab of rock right at the edge where a person could sit and take in the view. Dangerous for sure, but a pretty awesome feeling to be that close to the edge.
I hung out there for a bit before heading back into the woods. When I cut back into the woodline, I noticed something below that demanded closer inspection:
The photo doesn’t do a good job of showing the steepness of the hill going down to the waterfall. I can assure you that it was at least mildly perilous. This is definitely one of my new favorite places.
This trip was just getting better and better. My plan had been to hike North along the creek until the second time it turned Northeast, then packraft my way back to the truck. I was almost sad when the creek turned, but I was super excited to get in the water. Making my way toward the water, I found this rock formation with a giant gorge in either side.
The terrain was too tricky to get a photo at the top, but I did snap this one from the bottom. If you look where I’m pointing, you’ll see two small caves at the base of the rock. I assume they connect in the middle, but we’ll have to verify that on an exploration trip very soon..
And now it was time for the fun part. I inflated my packraft and the $5 inflatable surfboard I was using for an inflatable floor. I put all of my stuff in a “waterproof” bag, (waterproof, my ass), and roped it to the back of the boat so it wouldn’t weigh me down. Then it was time for the fun part.
I found a nice calm pool where the water wasn’t moving too quickly and shoved off. At first, the water was relatively calm…almost relaxing. In several places, like the one pictured below, there are small trickles of water feeding the creek.
90% of the time, this creek is mostly dry. I’ve only ever seen it floatable after sustained heavy rains and/or flooding. And since the water level is never really constant, you just never know what the conditions will be like. Up until this point, there were very few strainers and only a small rapid or two.
The boat was doing well, my drybag was still floating and I had somehow managed to not drop my camera in the creek. I had no idea what time of day it was anymore, and that’s how I know I’m having a good day.
Little did I know the “drybag” was filling with water and all of my fresh clothes for after the float would be soaked. Coming around a bend in the creek, I could hear the rapids ahead and saw that I had to make a decision.
After that, things started happening a lot faster. A few quick rapids later I found myself dodging this little strainer.
I realize the video quality isnt the best, but you have to understand I was holding the camera in my mouth. By now I was full of confidence and ready for the next volley of rapids. This next video shows you why I bought a packraft in the first place. I’m sure these rapids would be no big deal in a whitewater kayak or maybe even a canoe, but in a small inflatable boat….excitement abounds.
I’m sure you could hear a *little bit* of fear in my voice on that one, but I assure you.. the fear was totally eclipsed by the excitement of that moment. Moments like those are the ones that make all your cares disappear. Your entire world is right there in the boat, there are no wandering thoughts of bills, careers or anything. All you think about is the spray in your face, the paddle in your hands and the ice cold water marinating your testicles….and I suppose you think about the friends you wish were there to share the experience.
I don’t think I’m being modest when I say the CAC2 has the best orienteering leg of any non-race we’ve ever put together. I can pretty much guarantee everyone, even the seasoned racers, will be impressed with what the CAC2 has to offer. And as much as I’d love to post photos of all the cool stuff you’ll see…I don’t want to ruin the surprise.
That’s a picture of my little brother on a “not so recent” CAC2 scouting mission. Despite the obvious badassery going on in this photo, I can assure you that the picture does absolutely no justice to either the coolness of the rock arch he stands upon, nor does it depict the deathplunge he would’ve experienced if he’d taken one step backward off of the rock. The CAC2 is supposed to be fun, but there are times when the CAC2 will demand your ultimate respect. Checkpoints have been placed in areas that showcase the land’s natural beauty, but also expose you to a bit of danger. This shit is serious business. (sometimes)
In that light, we’re going to require that you bring a bit of mandatory gear.
Individual Gear for the Entire Race:
- Backpack with at least 50 ounces of hydration (bladder, bottles, old Boy Scout canteen, whatever)
- Rain Jacket
- Blaze-orange vest or scarf or hat (anything blaze-orange) to keep hunters from shooting your ass
- Wool or Synthetic Stocking Cap
- Headlamp w/ fresh batteries
- Camera (not exactly mandatory, but we’d LOVE to see some photos of our CAC in action)
Individual Gear for the Bike Leg:
- Mountain Bike
- Rear-Facing Red Blinking Light
- Spare Tube
Team Gear for the Entire Race:
- Fully-Charged Cell Phone in waterproof container (make sure it’s charged!)
- Small First Aid Kit
- Iodine Tablets or other water treatment method
- Waterproof Map Case
Team Gear for the Bike Leg:
- Bike Tool
- Pump or Inflator
- Patch Kit
Other Stuff I would bring:
Lawn chair, beer, various forms of pork, a positive attitude, DOG SPRAY, wood splitter, WTFAR repellent, a change of clothes, some clean shoes, Mayonnaise and/or Ranch Dressing for Brian of WTFAR, toilet paper, sunscreen, camera, extra batteries, a blow-up doll for Adam, extra bbq sauce, lip balm, coffee, tent and sleeping bag, extra compass.
That should cover just about everything for now. Stay tuned for an update on the Gravel Grinder we’re doing on Sunday after the CAC2.
Hello once again to all of you Virtusites out there! I’ll keep this one short today (no, seriously). In two weeks, on April, 13th, The Ava Brown Memorial 5K is being held here in Jefferson City, MO.
For those of you who don’t know why this race is so near and dear to us, please go read this post right here. Every time Spring rolls around, I go back and reread that post, and every time I read it, I break down and cry a little bit. It was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever written. You should also read all of the comments on that post to see how amazing our friends and families are.
Two years ago, Team Virtus raised over $1000.00 for this great event! ***WARNING! – the previous link contains a photo of me half-naked. You’ve been warned.*** While we aren’t doing the same type of fundraising this year, we’d still love to see you at the race. If you can’t come out and run or walk but you’d still like to help us fight SIDS, you can donate here.
Rumor has it that Kage has been training for a 5K PR. Will she get it at the Ava Brown 5K? If you know Rage Kage, then you wouldn’t bet against her. And the good news is, she’ll be in a new age group this year! She will hit the big Five – Oh about a week before the race, so even if she misses her PR, she has a good shot at placing in the top three in her new age group.
So, we hope to see you out there in a couple of weeks. I’ll be running for Ava and for my nephew Benji. Will you join us?
Good morning everyone, Bob Jenkins here, reporting to you via my new cell phone (gasps) regarding the status of CAC2, “The Second Coming”.
As one might expect, the recent snowfall has made course setup..interesting this year. Robby and I went out yesterday to hang our newly acquired and totally legit CP markers
Personally, I could not be more excited that we no longer have to walk thru the woods carrying lengths of pvc pipe to make orienteering flags.
Things are coming along nicely, and I have no doubt that this year’s course will be both fun and challenging.
Of note, we placed a flag yesterday that will likely pivotal to CAC victory. It’ll take some savvy navigating to find, and you could literally be standing on top of it and not even know. In fact, I’m completely open to putting a wager on whether or not Team WTFAR will ever locate it on their own with no help or GPS.
That right there is a natural rock arch. There’s no way Garrison is finding that thing.
In other news, a list of all required gear will be posted soon, and I hope you have some thorn-proof pants.