Monthly Archives: July 2012
A Monster of a Group Ride
I have big news, everyone: Our man Jim Smith, overlord of Monster Bicycle Company and proud sponsor of the Cedar Cross, is organizing a long group ride on the Katy Trail.
Ride deets are as follows:
Date of departure: 10/20/2012
Point A: Columbia, MO
Point B: Hermann, MO
Distance from A-B: Approximately 90-ish miles
Upon arrival at point B, Jim wishes for us to “camp and be merry.” I’m cool with that.
The next morning, we’ll resume travel in an Easterly direction en route to Point C
Point C: St. Charles, MO
For anyone who has never done a long Katy Trail ride, there’s a trip planner at www.bikekatytrail.com where you can find tons of info regarding places along the trail to refill water/buy food/take a crap, etc. There are towns and trailheads about every 10 miles, so you can customize this ride to suit yourself. The possibilities are literally endless.
You can bet I’ll be stopping in Treloar for delicious cheeseburgers and again in Augusta for a growler of their fabulous craft beer. This is going to be a great ride with great people, and you should be there. ALL are welcome.
Rumor has it that Jim is going to be giving away one of his custom-built titanium frames during this ride, but I might be making that up. Seriously, I’m totally lying about that.
The Tour De Donut is this Weekend
For those who don’t remember, Team Virtus put on a disappointing performance at last year’s Tour de Donut. Between Luke, Adam and Rusty only 22 donuts were consumed. Though I was unable to attend, I’ve heard varying tales of dauntingly thick, cake-style donuts and how hard it was to stay hydrated and still eat them. Still, one has to wonder what the hell happened out there…
Things must be set right beteween the Tour de Donut and Team Virtus. The world demands donut domination, and that responsibility appears to have fallen squarely on the shoulders of Kate and I. The other guys are too ashamed of themselves to try again, and that’s totally understandable. Excuses abound; Adam even went so far as to make up a story about “job-shadowing” at Pauline Potter’s gyno clinic:
At any rate, I’m throwing the gauntlet down right now and pledging to the world that NOT ONLY will I consume more donuts this year than each of them did last year, no, that wouldn’t be enough. I will eat more than they did combined. I’m gonna go the distance… to redeem what has been lost.
23 donuts or death!! See you there.
Kate: Lucky for Bob, I wasn’t a member of Team Virtus at last year’s Tour de Donut, or he’d be stuck eating an additional 9 donuts (one more than Adam choked down, for those who are keeping track). After 2010’s second place donut-adjusted AG victory, I had high hopes for 2011. Unfortunately, I fell flat, placing 6th in my AG and spending the next month or so working off those donut calories. This year, I’m still deciding on my strategy, but leaning towards a very un-Virtuslike donut avoidance. After all, I’d kind of like to finally check out the RibFest after the race…without having to throw up first.
Congrats and Shame!
I’ve gotta be honest… I’m a bit disappointed right now. I nonchalantly slipped a HUGE announcement into my last post, and only ONE Virtusite noticed it and responded accordingly (Thank you James Browning!!! You get the Gold Star!). So this means one of three things:
- You didn’t read my last post, so shame on you… OR
- You read it and somehow missed the huge announcement, so shame on you again… OR
- You read it, saw the announcement, and didn’t think it was worthy of a comment, so DOUBLE SHAME on you!
So I guess I’m going to have to spell this one out for you. Our very own Robert L. Jenkins III has completely duped convinced Cara Willoughby to marry him!!! That’s right…
Bob and Cara are ENGAGED!!!
If you’re reading this and if you care at all, please leave a comment for Bob and Cara. If you don’t, then SHAME on you!
So, congratulations, Bob and Cara! May you enjoy many decades of wedded bliss. Here’s to hoping you make many future adventure racers together, and hopefully, we can get Tenacious D to play at the wedding. Anyway… We love you guys.
On a side note, Bob turns 33 tomorrow, so happy birthday, Bob! You’re getting older, but you’re still young enough to be Maw Maw’s son.
Moonlight Ride
So, I know it’s VERY short notice, but I just found out about this myself. Tonight is the Tour de Jeff City Moonlight Ride. I guess technically the ride is tomorrow morning at 2:00 AM, but you know what I mean. I’m not sure why this ride isn’t publicized more, because we had an absolute blast last year.
Adam and his girlfriend Michelle, Bob and his then-girlfriend-now-FIANCE!!!! Cara, and my wife, Becca, and I were all supposed to do the 15-ish mile ride together. However, when it was time to roll out, there was no sign of Bob or Cara. I tried sending Bob a telepathic wake-up-call, but he’s a pretty deep-sleeper.
Michelle and Becca were both very new to cycling, so they were pretty nervous about riding in front of so many other people. They did a great job, though, and we had a really great time.
About a third of the way through the ride we saw this Tool Bag pull up in front of us:
Apparently, someone (Cara) turned the alarm off before it really woke either of them up. I guess my telepathic message must have actually worked! Yes, we are that close. Cara, unfortunately, just couldn’t make herself get out of bed.
So now we were riding 5-strong: Two couples and Bob on his Kona Joe.
We took our time and enjoyed the ride together. It was a beautiful evening spent on our bikes with great company, so what more could you ask for? At about the halfway point, we stopped for some refreshments at the aid station, and we took a few “couples” shots:
We then rolled past the capitol building which is always really cool at night, and then we stopped for a photo-op by the fountains. Look at this photo, and you’ll see why Becca is the perfect match for me:
We all had a lot of fun, and Becca and Michelle did great on their first big group ride. There were no crashes at all… Until the VERY end. We made it back to the parking lot at Hyvee, and as Michelle rolled off the street and into the parking lot, she got a little cocky. She was pretty excited to have ridden her bike so far with no crashes, and as she entered the parking lot, she raised one hand in triumph and let out a victorious, “Woo Hoo!” And then BAM! She crashed right there in front of us. It was amazing.
It was fantastic, and we all had a good laugh (once we knew she was okay, of course). My kids heard this story and to this day whenever they see Michelle, they say, “Woo Hoo! Bam!” And that cracks me up every time.
After loading the bikes back up, we headed over to Country Kitchen for some grub. This was probably my favorite part of the event. We sat around talking, laughing, telling stories, and making fun of Michelle. We even found out some disturbing info from Bob’s childhood, but you had to be there. We were sworn to secrecy.
As you can see, this ride is really great. With this crazy heat we’ve had for the last couple of weeks, there is no better time to ride than 2:00 AM, right? And we all have the day off tomorrow to catch up on sleep, so there is no excuse for missing this ride. Let us know if you’ll be there so we can all ride together or at least meet up after the ride for breakfast.
And be sure to go here for the map and other info. We are starting and ending at St. Peter’s Church on Broadway by the Capitol this year instead of at Hyvee. You don’t want to be like Cara and miss all the fun do you? We might even have another “Woo Hoo! BAM!” moment. You don’t want to miss that, do you? Anyway, we really hope to see you there.