Speedo Vote for The Thunder Rolls

So we need your help in a bad way. For those of you that have been living under a rock for the last few months, you may not be aware of “The Speedo Bet.” You see, I bet Bob that he could not eat 23 or more donuts at the Tour de Donut. Well, Bob only ate 18 donuts and he barfed, so I won the bet. Now the time has come for Bob to make good on that bet.

This weekend at The Thunder Rolls 24-Hour Adventure Race, Bob will have to wear a Speedo Bikini, and nothing but a Speedo Bikini, for one entire leg of the race (in addition to socks, shoes, backpack, etc.) Well, I finally got around to ordering Bob’s Speedo, and here it is:

Bob Jenkins Speedo

Now and forevermore, Bob shall be known as Goldmember

Simple, classic, understated, and yet so stunning. Don’t you think? I almost ordered him a thong, but then I realized that Kage and I were going to have to see him in this thing up-close and personal. So I opted for a traditional Speedo.

Anyway, I have not decided when Bob will wear the Speedo, and that’s where you come in. Please take just a moment to fill out the poll below. Your vote counts, so don’t be shy. And leave a comment with some words of encouragement for Bob.

This is serious business. Do you want Bob to bare most of his flesh while trekking through thorns, poison ivy, and stinging nettle? Or do you want him in nothing but a Speedo while biking over bumpy, gravel roads and thus destroying his taint? Or are you going to be nice and have him wear the Speedo at night on the paddling leg of the race where he will be mostly hidden by the canoe and life jacket?

The choice is yours. Choose wisely.

And be sure to check us out on Facebook and Twitter as we’ll be sure to post some photos and updates throughout the race this weekend.

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About Lukas Lamb

Husband to a wonderful wife, father to 4 incredible kids (3 daughters and 1 son), adventure racer, mountain biker, runner, lifter of weights, reader of books, and lover of life. He can be found on Google+

Posted on August 21, 2012, in Nonsense and Tomfoolery, Total Failure, Upcoming Races and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 38 Comments.

  1. This is way too funny ! But I can’t even imagine seeing BOB in a Speed, a gold one at that. I have to work with him and then now to see him in a speedo in a race is not a good thing ! LOL ! Dang BOB why couldn’t you eat more of those damn donuts? I guess we will ALL have to start calling you “GOLDMEMBER” at work now. LOL ! !

  2. This can’t be happening to me.

  3. Christine peppler

    OMG Luke this made me crack up!!!! You are so freaking funny!!! please post pics, I don’t wanna seem them but I gotta!!! LOL

  4. As a fellow bet loser myself, I beg of you to take mercy on Bob. Wearing just a speedo is cruel. At least let him wear a shirt or his pack will shred his shoulders and pits raw. Humiliation is one thing, and I’m all for it and I plan on laughing my ass off, but personnal injury is another. That being said, I’m voting for trekking during the night so the bugs will eat his flesh to bone. Muhahahahahahahaha. Muhahahahahahaha! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  5. That was tough. Especially since I played a part in the unsuccessful donut attempt. There really is no good option and the canoe seems a bit easy and everything at night should be thrown out because in order to become truly legendary lots of people have to see it. I guess that wasn’t so tough after all.
    After this race though you guys might need to call 1-800-BETSOFF, and get some help.

  6. I was gonna vote rappelling but no one should have to look up and see the low-hanging fruit

  7. It has to be the ropes. At night is too lame. In the canoe is too just us. On the trek is too sadistic. On the bike…well, let’s just say I don’t want Bob to deal with any additional chafing because we’re going to see enough of him. The ropes, on the other hand, will give the best chance for photo ops. I just want to go first so my belayer’s eyes aren’t hurting from that flashy speedo.

  8. I really think this is going to cause Bob way too many problems. This guy is engaged, and after seeing all of his butt pics on your site and now his Goldmember too, the Female Fans of Virtus are going to be banging down his door.asking him to reconsider his engagement. He’s probably going to end up with at least 15 cat loving, knitting stalkers, and I just don’t want to see that done to the man. I beg of you, please have mercy.

  9. I voted for the ropes. Seems like that is always where the most pictures and videos get taken!

  10. I say just make him wear it the whole race.

  11. scott fredrickson

    The ropes will be the best opportunity. The rest is just torture enough. Maybe, if ropes aren’t enough, the post race photo should be made “mandatory speedo”. Sorry bob, but 23 donuts? gotta live with consequences.

  12. I voted for the ropes because I think the harness will drive him “nuts” and give him wedgies!!!!!!! I wish I was there to see it happen because I would peer my pants!!!! Somebody HAS to video tape it for me!!!!!! Good luck Bob!!!!!! 🙂

  13. I voted ropes because I’m picturing the sun glowing around an angelic statue as he and his golden “package” gracefully float down from the skies above. Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s how it will go down.

  14. If there is a tie will Bob agree to wear it for all legs of the race that are tied? I think a good sport would. (lets get a 6 way tie).

  15. Does he have to wear the boots, push up bra, tiara, and golden lasso with that, too? Ouch. Tough bet.

  16. scott fredrickson

    Maybe for the most exposure, Speedo at the checkin and team meeting. Everyone will be there. Then the poor guy doesn’t have to suffer physically during what will already be a grueling race. Plus, the trek sections of TR is always full of thorns. That would just be beyond cruel. Good teammates, bet or not, wouldn’t want to see their teammate suffer that bad through thorns practically naked.

    • Did Bob put you up to this? Or maybe, It’s Bob posing as Scott.

      I think the trekking leg might be a bit cruel too. However, there are no thorns on the bike leg right? No single track, just gravel roads. The ropes section shouldn’t be too thorny either right?

      The volunteers might not fully appreciate the view but I bet he will make people smile whever he ends up wearing it.

      How about wearing it to dinner at our usual spot? I am sure they would love it based on their full acceptance of vegans.

    • I totally agree, Scott. I think the fixed ropes is the way to go, though, since it is part of the race, a good photo/video-op, and it’s probably the shortest leg of the race. Don’t worry, Bob’s my BFF, and while I still think this will be hilarious, I don’t want to see him suffering (at least not physically). I’ll make sure he’s taken care of.

    • Thanks for the help, but believe it or not, I’d rather take my chances with the thorns than to be in a room will ALL the other racers. At least if we’re on the course when I’m wearing that abomination we’ll likely be alone

  17. Please keep the fashion out of the Tetherball Death Match of Doom. I don’t want any excuses when I bring the Tetherball World Championship Belt back to Iowa. I’m so sure of victory that I volunteer Todd to wear Bob’s used Speedo if I lose.

  18. So how many times are we able to vote?

    • I think from as many diffrent computers that you hav access to. It looks like you get 1 vote from each computer (I guess 1 vote per IP address?).

  19. I can not wait to have every body see Bob in a speedo hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa 🙂 hhhhhaaaaa 🙂

  20. I voted for the ropes too. I do wish you would consider having him wear a cape along with the speedo.

    • First, based on Kage’s report, awesome effort gentlemen (and Kage). Um. Kage posted photos of Goldmember rapelling, but no photos of Goldmember ascending? What the heck?!? “Fixed Ropes (Rappelling . . . and Ascending)” I think you may owe your voting public (“Votusites”?) an explanation.

      • Good point James. Stay tuned for part two of my race report for the full explanation and all of the details.

        • James Browning

          I’ll add that to the list. I’m still staying tuned for your final installment of LBL. You readers could never figure out whether you and Bob made up after your fight in the woods. Just sayin’. C’mon. Your public demands full disclosure.

  1. Pingback: Incredible Journey: The Thunder Rolls 24-hr AR | superkatedotcom

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