In the darkness with “The Darkness”


These days it seems like everybody’s too busy (or broke) to get out and race, and even when we do,we’re too busy afterwards to blog about it. With the recent shortage of quality posts, it occurs to me that our blog is quite idle. So while the following story isn’t my best work and doesn’t recount a race or something truly athletic..I think it’s worth talking about.

Due to a staffing issue in November/December, I was working just about everyday. So when I got a day off..I was going outside. On one such day, I was fortunate enough to have the same day off as my good friend Robby Brown, (aka The Darkness). This called for immediate action, so we made plans for an epic man-trip into the woods. Pretty exciting stuff if you ask me.

Prepping our gear at the trailhead, it was obvious that Robby had enough food and beer for the two of us.


These woods are mostly foreign to Robby, save for the portion we used at Cedar Cross last year. It was fun to show off some of the cool landmarks I’ve found over the last 2 years, like this man-eating sinkhole.


Hiking at a spirited pace, it took us about 40 minutes to reach the evening’s campsite. With an already-built fire ring and easy access to Cedar Creek, this is one of my favorite places to camp. We built the fire, emptied our beer cans and ate peanuts while the rest of the world dreaded going to work the next day. Many, many stories were told around the campfire and maybe even a few we should’ve kept to ourselves.


In honor of Luke’s absence, I took a “stream photo” of Robby.  Don’t ask.

The beers were flowing like wine and our spirits were high:


Sitting next to the fire, the moon was so bright we didn’t even need headlights. The wind was non-existent, so the flames and smoke all went straight up; it was pretty awesome if I do say so.


Eventually we fell asleep,


With the bottle still in my hand. Dad would be proud

and when morning came, it was to the tune of 2 well-deserved hangovers.


Seems like it would’ve been a good idea to pack some water with all that beer..

Hiking out, I showed Robby a few places that may or may not be part of the CAC2.


Todd Garrison will never find this rock ledge.

As we all know by now, the Cedar Creek trail is home to several trails that are not on the map. Typically, these trails begin and end at the same place, so when Robby and I got temporarily separated, (opposite sides of a creek), I told him to just keep hiking and eventually our paths would cross again.


As my trail ascended a large hill, his cut across a low-lying creekbed several hundred feet away and then branched left. By the time I realized I was on a trail completely foreign to me, Robby was nowhere to be seen.


Ok….where am I???

The trail I had taken came to an end in someone’s driveway. Seriously. I spoke with a man who happened to be standing in his yard, and he sent me on my way to the truck. I was only off by a couple hundred yards, and while it was exciting to find a new trail, I was somewhat concerned that Robby might take a wrong turn and never be seen again.

I got to the truck first and waited for about 5 minutes before I let myself panic. Leaving my gear in the truck, i got a drink of water and started running the trail. About 2 miles later I still hadn’t found him. That meant he was either back at the truck or halfway to Boydsville. Not really good news either way. Since I don’t own a cell phone, I had no way of calling him….until I ran across a pair of horseback riders.  I borrowed a phone from one of them and scrambled to the top of the nearest hilltop.

Robby: Hello?

Me: Robby, hey where are you?

Robby: I’m sitting at the truck waiting on your ass.

So, I ‘spose I did a bit of unnecessary trail running, but it worked itself out in the end.  Gotta love the Cedar Creek trail. 🙂

About Bob Jenkins

Crusher of beers.

Posted on March 12, 2013, in Adam masturbates, Nonsense and Tomfoolery, Redemption for Adam's failures. Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Damn, I wish I would’ve gone. And I’m glad you didn’t lose The Darkness. That would NOT have been a CELEBRATIONNNN! And Sarah would have never let Robby come out and play with us ever again.

  2. It may not be an athletic event, but I think this is exactly the kind of thing we’d all like to do more of.

    Well, except Adam…he’s so dang afraid of chipping his nail polish.

  3. The horseback riders lent you their cellphone? Hmm, maybe they’re not all d-bags.

    So what is the story behind Robby’s nickname?

    • Yeah, it makes it harder to hate them when they’re so nice.

      To make a long story short, We call Robby “The Darkness” because his penis looks like Gary Coleman’s forearm.

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