Hangin’ with the boys

When I was growing up, my dad always told me, “Don’t sweat the small shit.” I may have taken those words a bit too seriously, because the list of things I take seriously is pretty darn short. So while most people are worried about their careers, money and whatnot..I’m more worried about whether or not I have enough candy in my truck in case I run into these two:

Cool sunglasses and cycling caps..check and check

Cool sunglasses and cycling caps..check and check

Being a fun uncle is serious business. You’ve gotta constantly be looking for new ways to deliver the perfect combination of wedgies, swirlies, candy, leg punches, hugs and more candy. These two were riding Strider bikes before they were out of diapers,

and this last Christmas they got some “big bikes.” The promise was made that after they got better acquainted with the new bikes, I’d  take them on a legit mountain biking trip. When that day finally came, I don’t know who was more excited.. them or me. Ok, it was me.

Bug juice: Check gummi bears: check Excitement building

Bug juice: Check
gummi bears: check

Arriving at the trail, we ran through the motions of pumping up tires and donning helmets. I only brought one Camelbak, and that’s a mistake I won’t make twice. They fought over the damn thing all day. It made for some cute photos, though.

Serious business

Serious business

Since I didn’t really know what their skill level would be, we started out on an easy downhill into the field.

It was obvious this was too easy for them, so we moved it on down the trail. I’d ride ahead and wait, and they’d come flying along right behind me. The boys were riding well and I was laughing constantly. We were all having a great day.

Luke "ridin' heavy" with the Camelbak

Luke “ridin’ heavy” with the Camelbak

Of course, there were a few wrecks:

But I also got some really great action shots and video. Here’s a pic of Wyatt carving a left turn


Most of the hills were too steep for them to pedal, but they didn’t seem to mind pushing to the top as long as there was a downhill on the other side.

And of course, the topic of riding without helmets was brought up. As you can clearly hear in the following video, that idea was shot down.

More crashes and lessons in hiding pain

And what father wouldn’t love to get this video while he’s at work?

As the afternoon wore on, I was blown away (and slightly afraid) at how much faster the boys were riding. I mean, I don’t wanna be one of those people who thinks their nephew is the next big thing, but look at the speed this 5 year old is holding through the turns…

My face literally hurt from laughing and smiling so much that afternoon, but the true hilarity ensued when I taught these fine young men an important life lesson every uncle should teach his nephews….

…..and if that doesn’t make you laugh…you’re probably an asshole.

I’ll probably think about that trip when I’m on my deathbed. What a great day.

About Bob Jenkins

Crusher of beers.

Posted on May 12, 2013, in Bob's recruits, Wedgies and candy. Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. This is a great post. You’re a fantastic uncle to all the kids around you. I’m not sure anyone else could pull of the pseudo-abusing, candy dealing, laid back fun with anywhere near the style that you do, but there’s a short list of people who could teach my little boy to give the middle finger and get away with it, but you’re on it. (Don’t get any ideas, though, bc that would put you on a very different list in my husband’s book). Your nephews and Lamb nieces are lucky to have you.

  2. They handle the downhills better than Kate. I was a cool uncle, still am I guess but my nephew is 32 now. You will be surprised at just how big an influence you have on those two. I stopped giving wedgies when he was 18, but do what feels right for you.

  3. And this is why my kids call you Uncle Bob. I can’t wait to beat the crap out of and spoil your kids to return the favor.

    And Luke and Wyatt have some serious skills. My kids have some catching up to do, but then we all need to get out there on the trails.

    Great post, man. It made me smile and laugh.

  4. Awesome day for sure! Great memories for sure. Loved all the pics and videos.

    Flipping the bird is an essential life lesson for sure 🙂

  5. Great post, Bob. You can tell how much those two look up to you and how much you love teaching them things about life. Appropriate or not. Our kind of parenting.

  6. Will you be my uncle Bob? Nice work!

  7. brandon lepage

    Great post and great memories!

  8. I just got a chance to watch all the videos. Very cool Bob….very cool. I especially like how quickly he wanted his helmet buckled after you gave him the options.

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