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From Clydesdale Racer to Chippendales Dancer Part IV

Okay, it’s been about a month and a half since I gave an update on my quest to leave the Clydesdale division. Apparently, the accountability blog/contest that I was involved in has come to an abrupt end. Several people dropped out, and the guy behind the website/podcast didn’t want to do it anymore.  There hasn’t been an update in 3 or 4 weeks, but rest assured that I did not quit.  I held up my end of the bargain.  I trained hard and ate according to plan.  I submitted photos and a write-up of my training and diet every week.  For some reason, though, the whole thing fell through.  If you want to see weekly progress pictures of me and read a little bit about my training (and you’re a little weird if you do), you can go here and scroll down to find me.

Since that blog is now defunct, I guess I’ll go back to horrifying all of you, our loyal readers, with monthly updates on my progress.  On January 1st, I weighed a whopping 230 pounds, and I looked like this:

Fat Luke

01/06/10 - Weight was 227

And this…

Fat Luke from the side - 01/06/10

Fat Luke from the side on 1/6/10

I know… I was pretty disgusting wasn’t I?  Please accept my sincere apologies for getting those images stuck in the back of your head all day.

Well, it’s been about 3 and a half months since those photos were taken.  I now weigh 205 pounds for a total of 25 pounds lost so far this year with just 5 more pounds to go before I’m no longer a Clyde!!! I took these photos last week on 4/12/10:

Semi-Fat Luke - Almost out of the Clydesdale Division

4/12/10 - Semi-Fat Luke

Semi-Fat Luke from the Side

Semi-Fat Luke from the Side - 4/12/10

I should be right at 200 pounds for Syllamo’s Revenge on May 1st.  I’ve been training hard, and I’m in waaaaay better shape than I was at the beginning of the year, but I’m still terrified that I’m going to fail at Syllamo’s.  I don’t know if I can ride 50 miles of single track since I’ve never done anything close to that.  I’ll do everything in my power to finish that race before the time cutoff, though. We’ll see how it goes.

I’ve still got a long way to go, but it’s a decent start. Since I’m going to meet my goal of leaving the Clydesdale Division by May 1st (if all goes well), my new goal is to hit 195 or less by Memorial Day Weekend.  I’ll keep posting monthly updates to let you know how it’s going (unless we get flooded with hate-mail saying to please remove the obscene photos from the interwebz).

So, how are you doing this year?  Are you reaching your goals?  Maybe you’ve surpassed them already.  If that’s the case, then set new ones.  Or maybe you’ve faltered or had a setback.  So what!  Get back on track and start again! One third of the year is almost gone, and we’ll never get it back – ever.  But you can still make amazing progress with the remaining two thirds of 2010. Seriously, if I can make progress, then anyone can.

Point of No Return – From Clydsedale Racer to Chippendales Dancer

Alright… This is going to get ugly… And I mean really ugly. I’m talkin’ Rosie O’Donnell-With-No-Makeup-Ugly.  But this is just something I’ve got to do.  I have no choice.  My good friend and Teammate, Bob Jenkins, has burned his ships on the shores of his enemy.  And now I’m ready to up the ante, so to speak.  I have to do something to hold myself accountable.  So here goes…

Once upon a time, I actually had abs.  No, seriously.  I really did.  Please stop laughing.  And I mean abs that you could actually see.  In fact, I was so shredded that I even had back-abs.  Okay, that’s not true.  Seriously, though, I used to be in really good shape.  Unfortunately, I got fat and lazy.  Actually, I guess I got lazy and then I got fat, but the two seem to go hand in hand.  In fact, someone actually once told me, “You look like you used to work out.”  Wow… That isn’t exactly a compliment, is it?

Over the last few years, my weight has fluctuated from 246.5 (my heaviest weight ever) down to 193, back up to 230, back down to 200, back up to 230, back down to 200…  It seems like every time I got close to my goal weight, I would just start to slowly slip back into my lazy, french-fry eating ways (Damn, I love fries!!!).

Well, I did it again.  As of January 4th, 2010, I was back up to 230 pounds again.  I am disgusted.  I am disappointed.  And I AM DONE!  I figured if I posted a picture of me on this blog and vowed to post a picture of me every month, then I’d have to make some serious changes – and STICK WITH IT.  Oh, I forgot to mention that I’d be topless in the pics.

So, this is gonna be hard, but I don’t care.  I have to do it.  So, here’s a warning.  If you have a weak stomach, then please don’t scroll down any farther.  If you couldn’t watch Bear Grylls squeeze water out of an elephant turd into his mouth, then you’d better not read on.  If you had to hide your eyes when Andrew Zimmern of Bizarre Foods ate this, then you should really stop right now.  I’ll wait while you find another post to read on our site…




You’re still with me?  Wow, you are a sicko, aren’t you?  Okay then.  I warned you.  This is your last chance to turn away before having an image of me without a shirt, burned into your mind permanently.  If you’re okay with that, then here goes:

Fat Luke

Fat Luke on 01/06/10 - Weight was 227

Fat Luke from the side - 01/06/10

Fat Luke from the side

Fat Luke's Back

From Back Abs to Back Fat - 01/06/10

So, there you have it.  I hope you don’t have too much trouble picking the chunks of vomit out of your keyboard.  Don’t blame me, though, because I warned you.

I’m already down to 222 as of this morning, so I’m on my way.  I’d like to get below 200 pounds by May 1st, which just so happens to be the date of Syllamo’s Revenge.  I still can’t believe I signed up for this thing.  I figure if I’m gonna ride 50 miles of single track in the Ozark Mountains of Arkansas, then I’d better no longer be a “Clydesdale.”  And, who knows?  If I end up getting Back abs, then I just might start a career as a Chippendales dancer (If you click that link, that’s me on the right and my future self on the left – hopefully without the poofy mullet).

So, that’s my goal.  Lose 22 more pounds in a little over 15 weeks AND KEEP IT OFF.  No problem, right?

Go ahead and make fun of me in the comments section.  Call me lard-ass.  Tell me how disgusted you are at the sight of me.  Tell me I’ll never make it.  I don’t care anymore.  The time is now.  As Bob said in his blog, “Failure is my motivation, and the tank is full.  Please……please doubt me. Oh, I love it when they doubt me.”

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

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